Fashion Dread'

So, March is a really special month for my family. March 6 was my mom's birthday, March 7 was my husbands, Tomorrow, March 12, is my 2nd wedding anniversary and March 13 is my oldest brothers birthday. On Saturday, I brought a birthday cake and we had a small little family shin-dig to celebrate. Anyway, when we got there and I whipped off Isaiah's hat and my brother asked me when we are cutting his hair (the pic below is Isaiah and my big bro). Then he proceeded to tease Isaiah about his mohawk (which I prefer to call a full hi-top). It is cute because as Isaiah's head got bigger his hair has thinned on the sides and in the back making it sort of look intentional. He also asked me what we planned to do with it, dreads (like Mama)? fro? short cut (like Papa)? I have no clue! Before we knew Isaiah was a boy, I used to really obsess over what I would do if I had a girl. Like many women of color, I have gone through SO many issues with my hair. When I finally decided to keep it natural and lock, it was a really hard decision. Long straight hair (processed or weave) had been a staple of why I felt beautiful. I had dated this DJ for 3 years in college and I had convinced myself I was his personal video girl lol. When I finally met my husband, I had all these ideas about beauty. I imagined myself a striking woman with long locks and a bohemian dress. My words had yet to match my mind, which had yet to match my physical appearance. When he met me I was still rocking my straight hair, tight jeans and light brown contacts. My husband fostered those ideas inside me until I finally had the strength in August of 2006 to head to a salon cut my hair to little nubs and make the switch!

Gone was the long straight mane, the color contacts... well, I kept the tight jeans lol. Anyway, it has kind of been an upward battle ever since. Some days, I HATE my hair. Other days, I look in the mirror and the image finally makes sense and I feel BEAUTIFUL. I always knew one thing was certain, I wanted to do whatever I could to ensure my daughter was much more comfortable with her "natural" self than I was. What woman doesn't want to take off all her clothes, not have a stitch of makeup on and still feel beautiful? This is not to say I don't still get dolled up now and then... But now I am truly enhancing what God have me... more of the natural me. Anyway, when my husband and I got married I made a deliberate effort to have natural hair for the ceremony. I wanted my daughter to look back on the day and think, the day Mommy felt the most beautiful, she was rocking her kinks and curls! So, I had it all down for a girl... but I had a boy. The question was, what does this mean for my baby boy? A friend of mine from law school told me once that she was dating this guy who told her he liked for her to have straight hair. She laughed and asked him, "Does your hair grow straight?" Hers didn't and as an African American, neither did his. I am reminded of this because I don't want Isaiah to be that guy. Not that he can't have preferences. I want my son to be happy. That means, as long as he isn't hurting anyone, I don't want him to feel like has to be someone he is not just to please me. On the same token, I don't want him to ever make someone feel like who they are, physically (unless they are dirty or something) isn't good enough. Perhaps, the more I learn to love myself, naturally, the more he will learn to love himself and other black people the same way... like his poppa loves me. So,I don't plan on cutting his hair.. yet. I sort of always envisioned my little boy with a big curly fro. Who knows? For now, we need to just work on his faux-hawk.